|
Title: Centipede!! Post by: Ryan Martis on August 10, 2009, 04:25:34 AM A man goes into a pet shop and tells the owner that he wants to buy a pet that can do everything. The shop owner suggests a faithful dog.
The man replies, "Come on, a dog?" The owner says, "How about a cat?" The man replies, "No way! A cat certainly can`t do everything. I want a pet that can do everything!" The shop owner thinks for a minute, then says, "I`ve got it! A centipede!" The man says, "A centipede? I can`t imagine a centipede doing everything, but okay... I`ll try a centipede." He gets the centipede home and says to the centipede, "Clean the kitchen." Thirty minutes later, he walks into the kitchen and... it`s immaculate! All the dishes and silverware have been washed, dried, and put away; the counter-tops cleaned; the appliances sparkling; the floor waxed. He`s absolutely amazed. He says to the centipede, "Go clean the living room." Twenty minutes later, he walks into the living room. The carpet has been vacuumed; the furniture cleaned and dusted; the pillows on the sofa plumped; plants watered. The man thinks to himself, "This is the most amazing thing I`ve ever seen. This really is a pet that can do everything!" Next he says to the centipede, "Run down to the corner and get me a newspaper." The centipede walks out the door. 10 minutes later... no centipede. 20 minutes later... no centipede. 30 minutes later... no centipede. By this point the man is wondering what`s going on. The centipede should have been back in a couple of minutes. 45 minutes later... still no centipede! He can`t imagine what could have happened. Did the centipede run away? Did it get run over by a car? Where is that centipede? So he goes to the front door, opens it ... and there`s the centipede sitting right outside. The man says, "Hey!!! I sent you down to the corner store 45 minutes ago to get me a newspaper. What`s the matter?!" The centipede says, "I`m goin`! I`m goin`! I`m just puttin` on my shoes! |