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Vatsal
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« on: January 19, 2006, 04:34:40 AM »

THIS IS A GREAT READ FOR ALL THE WOMEN OUT THERE!!!!

LEARN!!!!!!!!!!

Marriage - Part I
Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and after the
wedding, he laid down the following rules: "I'll be home when I want,
if I want and at what time I want and I don't expect any hassle from
you. I expect a great dinner to be on table unless I tell you that I
won't be home for dinner. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing and
card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don't you give me a
hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any comments?" His new bride
said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there will be sex
here at seven o'clock every night ......... whether you're here or
not."

(DAMM SHE'S GOOD!)


Marriage (Part II)
Husband and wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th wedding
anniversary! The husband yells, "When you die, I'm getting you a
headstone that reads: "Here Lies My Wife - Cold As Ever " "Yeah?" she
replies. "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads: "Here
Lies My Husband Stiff At Last"

(HE ASKED FOR IT!)


Marriage (Part III)
Husband (a doctor) and his wife are having a fight at the breakfast
table. Husband gets up in a rage and says, "And you are no good in bed
either," and storms out of the house. After sometime, he realizes he
was nasty and decides to make amends and rings her up. She comes to
the phone after many rings, and the irritated husband says, "what took
you so long to answer the phone?" She says, "I was in bed." "In bed
this early, doing what?" "Getting a second opinion!"

(YEP, HE HAD THAT ONE COMING, TOO!)


Marriage (Part IV)
A man has six children and is very proud of his achievement. He is so
proud of himself, that he starts calling his wife, "Mother of Six" in
spite of her objections. One night, they go to a party. The man
decides that it's time to go home and wants to find out if his wife is
ready to leave as well. He shouts at the top of his voice, "Shall we
go home 'Mother of Six?' His wife, irritated by her husband's lack of
discretion, shouts right back, "Anytime you're ready, Father of Four."

(RIGHT ON, LADY!)


Marriage (Part V) The Silent Treatment
A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving
each other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the
next day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early
morning business flight. Not wanting to be the first to break the
silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper, "Please wake me at
5:00 AM." He left it where he knew she would find it. The next
morning, the man awoke, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had
missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife
hadn't awakened him when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed. The
message on the paper read, "It is 5:00 AM. Wake up."


Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.

God may have created man before woman, but there is always a rough
draft before the masterpiece.

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