TELEGRAM  #1
A daughter sends a  telegram to her father on her
clearing B.Ed exams,  which
the father receives as :
"Father, your daughter  has been successful in BED."

TELEGRAM  #2
A husband, while he is  on a business trip to a hill
station sends a telegram to
his wife "I wish you were here." The message received
by  wife: "I wish you were
her."

TELEGRAM  #3
A wife with near maturing pregnancy goes to railway
station  to return to her
husband.
At the reservation  counter, while her turn came, it
was the last ticket. Taking
pity on a very old  lady next to her in the queue, she
offered her berth to the
old lady and  sent a telegram to her husband which
reached   as:
"Shall be coming  tomorrow, heavy rush in the train,
gave birth to an  old
lady."

TELEGRAM  #4
A man wants to celebrate his wife's Birthday by
throwing a  party. So  he goes
to order a birthday  cake. The salesman asks him what
message he  wants to put
on the  cake.
Well he thinks for a  while and says: let's put,
"you are not getting  older!  You are getting better".
The salesman asks "how do  you want me to put it?"
The man says, Well put >
"You are not getting  older", at the top and     "You
are  getting better" at
the bottom. The real fun didn't start until the  cake
was opened the entire
party watched the message decorated on the  cake:
"You are not getting  older at the top,
You are getting better at the  bottom".

TELEGRAM  #5
A man from Agra went!  to Ajmer. His wife was in her
parent's house in Delhi.
When the man went to Ajmer, he asked his  servant to
send a telegramto his wife
indicating about his trip  to Ajmer.
He sent a telegram. When  the wife received the
telegram, she fainted. It  was
written: sethji aaj mar gaye ! ( Sethji Ajmer gaye  ).