ARE YOU: IN LOVE, LUST OR MARRIED?

LOVE......................when your eyes meet across a
crowded room.
LUST.......................when your tongues meet
across a crowded
room.
MARRIAGE............when your belt won't meet around
your waist, and
you don't care.

LOVE......................when intercourse is called
making love.
LUST.......................all other times.
MARRIAGE............what's intercourse?

LOVE......................when you argue over how many
children to
have.
LUST.......................when you argue over who
gets the wet spot.
MARRIAGE............when you argue over money.

LOVE......................when you share everything
you own.
LUST.......................when you think twice about
giving your
partner bus money.
MARRIAGE............when the bank owns everything.

LOVE......................when it doesn't matter if
you don't climax.
LUST.......................when the relationship is
over if you don't
climax.
MARRIAGE............what's a climax?

LOVE......................when you phone each other
just to say
"G'day".
LUST.......................when you phone each other
just to organize
sex.
MARRIAGE............when you phone each other to find
out what time
your son's game starts.

LOVE......................when you write poems about
your partner.
LUST.......................when all you write is your
phone number.
MARRIAGE............when all you write is checks.

LOVE......................when you show concern for
your partners'
feelings.
LUST.......................when you couldn't give a
shit.
MARRIAGE............when your only concern is what's
on TV.

LOVE......................when your farewell is "I
love you darling
..."
LUST.......................when your farewell is "So,
same time next
week?"
MARRIAGE............when your farewell is silent.

LOVE......................when you are proud to be
seen in public with
your partner.
LUST.......................when you only ever see each
other in the
bedroom.
MARRIAGE............when you never see each other
awake.

LOVE......................when your heart flutters
every time you see
them.
LUST.......................when your groin twitches
every time you see
them.
MARRIAGE............when your wallet empties every
time you see them.

LOVE......................when nobody else matters.
LUST.......................when nobody else knows.
MARRIAGE............when everybody else matters and
you don't care who
knows.

LOVE......................when all the songs on the
radio describe
exactly how you feel.
LUST.......................when it's just the same
mushy old shit.
MARRIAGE............when you never listen to music.

LOVE......................when breaking up is
something you try not to
think about.
LUST.......................when staying together is
something you try
not to think about.
MARRIAGE............when just getting through today is
your only
thought.

LOVE......................when you're interested in
everything your
partner does.
LUST.......................when you're only interested
in one thing.
MARRIAGE............when you're not interested in what
your partner
does and the one thing you're interested in is your
golf score.