Two boys were arguing when the teacher entered the
room.
The teacher says, "Why are you arguing?"

One boy answers, "We found a ten dollor bill and
decided to give it to whoever tells the biggest lie."

"You should be ashamed of yourselves," said the
teacher, "When I was your age I didn't even know what
a lie was."

The boys gave the ten dollars to the teacher.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>


Teacher: Why are you late?
Student: There was a man who lost a hundred dollar
bill.
Teacher: That's nice. Were you helping him look for
it?
Student: No. I was standing on it.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Once there were three turtles. One day they decided to
go on a picnic. When they got there, they realized
they had forgotten the soda. The youngest turtle said
he would go home and get it if they wouldn't eat the
sandwiches until he got back. A week went by, then a
month, finally a year, when the two turtles said,"oh,
come on, let's eat the sandwiches." Suddenly the
little turtle popped up from behind a rock and said,
"If you do, I won't go!"